How to Grieve A Loved One In The Midst of A Pandemic
This post was co-created by SH, LLC project manager and staff writer Hayleighhuston
How do you begin the grieving process if everything about grieving has been thrown out the window due to a global crisis going on?
Much of our “normalcy” has been tossed out the window if not, all of it.
I recently lost my grandpa, due to old age; he was 92, but this has been one of the hardest things I have ever endured.
I wasn’t able to see my cousins, family, or friends after he passed.
I wasn’t able to sit around the kitchen table, discussing stories about my grandpa.
I wasn’t able to get BIG hugs of support from my cousins, friends, and extended family members.
We have not been able to collectively celebrate my grandpa’s wonderful and long life that he lived.
There are just these small moments of remembering him that just doesn’t feel like it’s enough.
It’s been a month since my grandpa passed and it’s still raw as HELL and yet at the same time, it feels like it has been years since that day.
My sense of time is jumbled and sometimes I feel like I’m not doing enough to remember my grandpa.
I have been trying to answer the question, “How does one grieve during a global pandemic?”
And I think one of the first steps is to allow yourself to FEEL EVERYTHING.
Let it all out and cry.
Feel the sadness.
Feel the grief.
Feel the devastation because not only are we grieving the passing of a life, but we are grieving our OWN lives as well.
Remember that grieving takes time, now more than ever.
As scary as it sounds, learn to embrace this change in the grieving process.
Our lives are changing drastically.
Whether you have lost someone due to COVID, old age, or anything else, grieving does not get any easier.
Another idea that has definitely helped me and my cousin get through this difficult time, is writing a eulogy for your loved one to help release the sadness, and remember the good times and great memories.
Even growing up, I have found that listening to everyone’s stories is very comforting.
Usually, this is something that would happen in a funeral home or in your respective place of worship, but with that out of the picture, how do you collectively grieve?
One idea that my cousin Stephanie had, is a virtual funeral where anyone who would like to join can share a memory, story, pictures, ANYTHING.
We are so lucky to have social media as a way to connect with friends and families from the safety of our own homes.
And in a time of solidarity, this can be a great way to collectively mourn the loss of your loved one.
Everyone grieves in different ways. We must honor and respect everyone’s wishes for how they would like to grieve, especially in this chaotic time.
There is no right or wrong when it comes to grief.
Do what you believe is best for you and REACH OUT if you are struggling. REACH OUT if you notice someone else struggling.
It is okay to lean on others for support in a time of loss.
There is so much loss happening in the world that you can and will find someone who is in the same shoes as you.
Be kind to one another. You never know the battle someone is fighting or the loss that someone has endured.
